The weather had been bogus and after hitting a motel in Roanoke we ate breakfast while watching snowflakes dancing in the air. Not a good omen. We decided to head for Table Rock in the Linville Gorge area to start things out. Lots of driving and we decided to finish the day with a hike to Linville Falls instead of climbing. The kids liked the falls and Marti and I decided to motel it again instead of camping in the cold with the kids. We're wimps!! Alastair decided to be a he-man and camp out at the Table Rock trailhead while we headed for a warm motel room.
The next morning we drove up the highly bizarre road to the trail head. Miles of poor dirt, leading to a suddenly paved and very steep set of switchbacks. At the parking area, we meet Alastair. There's fresh snow on the ground and lots of clouds, but we're eager to face the rock. Marti wants no part of this madness and decides to take the kids up the tourist trail to the top. Even with the snow, the rock is dry and there are classic easy routes to be done.
The approach was short and we eventually found Skip to my Lou, a two pitch 5.6. The rock there is this bizarre metamorphosed granite, much like the rock up in Vermont at Dear Leap. Very few continuous crack systems; lots of crystals and pockets. For whatever reason, there are LOTS of bolts around, even on the easy routes. Aside from a balancy traverse near the start of the climb, it all seems easy. It's not cold enough to be unpleasant but is cold enough to keep the occasional snowflakes from melting on the rock. Alastair takes the next pitch up to a big ledge. From here, we can walk off or do another route to the top. We choose `My Route', 5.6. This one is big fun and covered with big, fat, shiny, totally unnecessary bolts. Who am I to argue with the local ethics? I clip and go and am soon at the belay. Alastair takes the last pitch. It's warming up and the rock is becoming moist, but that can't stop a real Scottish climber! After pulling the crux on the next pitch, Alastair finds that whoever was putting in the new shiny bolts must have run out - the rest of the way we were on antique bolts. Combining two leads, we hit the top. There was no question of doing any more climbing - the rock was getting wetter and wetter as the day warmed up. No view at all from the top - clouds everywhere. Marti and the boys were nowhere around so we headed down.
Near the bottom of the trail, we ran into the rest of the gang. They had made the top but decided not to wait. Jay had developed a new hiking theory - whenever things got tough, he would yell "Puppy Power" (a line from Scooby Doo) and jump up / down whatever was in his way. I have started using this technique while climbing: highly effective!
Nothing to do but drive on to Ashville. We stopped over at the Biltmore (a touristo attraction) and found out that you have to cough up $20 a person to see anything so we gave up on that and found (yet another) motel.
We've become addicted to the Weather Channel. Whatsitgonnado? Things are new looking up: increasingly sunny weather (but 6" of snow back in CT!). The next day, it's off to Looking Glass rock. The hike in is long for the kids but on a pleasant trail near a stream so everyone is happy. The south slabs are lower angle than the rest of the rock and have many nice 5.7 - 5.8 routes. The biggest problem is the water running down much of the rock.
We start out with Rat's Ass (5.8) - a fun finger crack / layback. The crux is getting past the wet spot at the bottom and then it's pure fun. Eyebrows (small horizontal cracks, rounded at the lower part) are not as frequent here as elsewhere at Looking Glass, but provide a few unexpected rests. Marti does the first pitch but it's still a bit cold and she lowers back down while Alastair and I finish the second pitch. The descent requires a full length rappel - we leave a rope fixed for the rest of the day so we can run up and down without a hassle.
Next, Alastair leads Zodiac (5.8+). A little hard to protect but still fun. He goes left at a ledge and joins Gemini Cracks (5.8) to belay. After I follow, I talk Eric into joining us. He flashes the first pitch of Gemini, avoiding all hand jamming in favor of laybacking and stems. Alastair takes the next pitch; Eric avoids the crux handjams by climbing friction to the left. The last pitch is wet so I catch a climb just to the left to top out.
Marti and I then do the opposite of what we had done: Gemini -> Zodiac. This involves some true Looking Glass style climbing: steep eyebrow-covered face climbing. Being tall made the lead a lot easier for me than Marti! Rapping down, the kids are ready to pack it in. Alastair and I decide to bag just one more route: the local classic, the Nose (5.8). Lokking class is a really big rock and we get lost following the trail around to the nose area. Much unpleasant bushwhacking (now we know - when in doubt, go up!) and we are there. It's late, it's cold, and it's time to climb. The climb is 4 pitches; we hustle as fast as possible. No cracks at all - just eyebrows. Way cool! The climbing is sort of a connect the dots - you keep looking ahead for a pattern of closely connected eyebrows. The crux is finding the route - once we figure out where to go, everything is fine. On top, it takes a while to realize that we can walk around the top pitch on exposed friction slabs to start the raps one pitch down. We're soon down and meet the gang at the cars.
Still cold - we look at the local campground but wimp out yet again ($29 for a motel vs $12 for a campsite, why freeze to death??). On the drive up, we're suprised to see an albino squirrel in the trees. When we get back, I read an article about Looking Glass that goes on at length about the local population of mutant squirrels: at least we got to see one!
The plan is to go back to the Nose area and take Marti and Eric up. There's also another classic 5.8 nearby. It's cold in the morning and the sun isn't on the nose yet so Alastair and I look for some sun at the `Sun Wall'. The only problem is all the routes there are HARD!! Looking at the book, we choose `Tits and Beer' as the lesser of the evils. As we suit up, chunks of ice melting out of the watergrooves overhanging us tinkle down: it's an Alpine Adventure!!
This part of the wall is one of the strangest chunks of rocks around. Besides the eyebrows, about 120' up is a set of wavy overhangs, sort of like gigantic rolls of fat. No vertical cracks pentrate these overhangs - only shallow water grooves. How in the hell do we get up those things? Will there be any pro?? Only one way to find out ...
Alastair takes a short lead up to the base of a crack. A vertical crack - the only one within miles! Cool. I can climb cracks. These's a shiny bolt guarding the entrance to the crack; Alastair clips this and some tricams for his belay (his first time setting tricams - at least the bolt looks good!) I arrive and contemplate the start of the pitch. Vertical wall with small eyebrows. None take pro but the bolt is OK. I go up - eeek! everything is rounded!! I waste time placing a crappy cam and step back down. Up a little higher. Another poor nut. Back down. One more - now I get a bomber wire and feel better. Still hard - I momentarily lose my ethics and hang. At least I can clean all the bogus pro for use higher up. Back down - this time I'm going to pull through without hanging! The good news is that the crack takes good hands and good pro. I start thrashing steadily upward, putting way too much gear. I'd be having fun if I wasn't so gripped! After 40' of desparation there's a ledge. Cool! Maybe I should belay here?? I still have some gear - let's see what's ahead. The crack gets funky: no more jams. Then it dies out completely. More hard stuff - yikes. I thrash up and find some lower angled rock (still lots of brows) with the overhangs just above. No ledges, though! Any anchors up there? I pull up under the hang and it's booty city! Four good nuts, three biners, and a sling. Like new! Someone must have been mighty gripped!!
Cool. I set a belay and bring Alastair up. He has trouble at the start but then begins moving steadily. He finally arrives, totally terrified. His hands are bloody - my hands are bloody - we're gripped - we're weenies - there's no belay ledge - but what the hell, let's have a look at the next pitch!! No chance Alastair wants it - it's up to me. Hmmm. Where to go. The topo shows left then right. The text says right then left works too. No chalk to follow. No obvious line. Hmmmmm. Maybe out left. It's easy to traverse - going up is the problem! There's pro at my feet, but nothing resembling a hold on the sloping ledge above the overhang. I guess I sort of do a `whale on the beach' move? Maybe a really high step? Maybe I give up??? Yeah - that's it! Gotta be easier somewhere else. Back to Alastair. He's not happy. Now out right - good pro, stand up, reach another gear placement at the limit of my reach. Cool. Progress. Down to think. Maybe I can move left on the ledge system. Back up, step left. Terrifying - no handholds and the protruding pillow of rock makes me feel like I'm about to fall over backward. But the gear is good - no excuses; I charge across. Whew! I'm still alive (and now about 10 feet directly over Alastair after 30 or 40 feet of climbing!). More gear; easy step up. Oh god, not again - another bulge with no handholds at the top. But wait - lower down, a real honest to god handhold. Sharp, with an edge! Cool. I feel better even though the new hold is too low to help much.
As usual, the key is to place lots of gear!! There seems to be a small opening in the crack above. Step delicately up - I can get one hand free. Maybe a cam. Hmmm - they are all gone. Step down - backclean? No - it's stuck. Try again - maybe a wire. Looks good. But how to move up now? Step left, reach up. Nothing. Back right. Bogus. Wait - a hidden handhold right by the nut. Balance up. Small edges. Step on the good handhold (hidden around the corner!). It's working. I'm totally committed but it's getting easier! Bomber cam. Big ledge. Belay time. Yahoo! Wait - no anchor. I go way right into a water groove and there is just enough crack for an anchor.
Alastair follows, totally gripped. Lotsa traversing so he's got to think. Stuck cams. Crux. He's up - let's get outta here! Seems like I've traversed so far we've missed the final 5.7 overhang. Too bad! Looks easy - Alastair leads. The rope runs out and I can't hear a thing. Start climbing. Wow - still another 300' to the top, but it's easy and we climb in tandem. God, we're glad to up that one.
We don't know where the local descent is so we hike to the trail at the top and head for the Nose raps we did the day before. Marti and the boys are waiting - it's really late; must have taken hours to cower up T and B.
Alastair has had enough - he takes Jay while Marti, Eric, and I take on the Nose. Fun, fun, fun - I know where the route goes and it's *so* *easy* after T and B. Eric is a total hero - friction moves get him past the hard bits. An ideal climb for him. Too late to bag the last pitch; we rap as the sun starts to set. Alastair and Jay are long gone - we coil and hike down.
At the car, there's no sign of Alastair and Jay. We call out and eventually fund the walking down the road. Seems they had gotten lost and did an epic cross country hike. Jay was mad - Alastair had gotten him into some briars. Oh, well. Everyone is back together again. Poor Alastair is now even more wasted.
Dinner and a long drive - we try to get near Stone Mountain. Marti joins Alastair and I get the boys. Jay sings the ABC song over and over and over and over ... Eric falls asleep before he has a chance to kill Jay. Midnite, another motel.
Stone Mountain. Great weather, wasted climbers. Alastair and I start with The Pulpit (5.8). Fun, well protected. Our trail rope get's stuck and we yell for help; a touristo unsnags it from a tree root and all is well. Next in Grand Funk (5.9). Alastair leads. Eric follows. He whines about his shoes hurting - gosh, he's becoming a *real* climber! He takes falls on the face climbing but runs right up the friction crux. Marti follows and they rap.
Alastair and I head for Fantastic (5.9). This starts in a crack and then traverses across a well-polished face with bolts. The crack is fun - hard move off the ground then fun. Leaving it is spooky but I clip the first bolt. This thing is ancient! Now I'm on very polished scoops. I'm not happy. Climb a few feet, get scared, step down, repeat. Alastair's turn - he refuses to even start the climb; something about the condition of his hands. Right. I head back up with my trusty antique biner to add to the bolt. Gotta do something with all the ancient gear on my rack! I choose to climb down instead of lower on the old biner. We're down. We're done. Time to drive to Seneca.
We pull in to Seneca at midnight. Seneca Shadows is closed - where to camp? We drive into Yokums - the private campground right by the rocks. Yuk - really gross looking! How about the motel? Again? Sure.
The next morning we head for the parking lot. Dave Fay and Mike Soo are meeting us. Mike flew in from Tampa just to climb here - gotta show him a good time! Marti and the kids take the day off - find a campsite, do laundry, rest. I'm with Dave, Mike is with Alastair.
We start with the classic SSS (5.8+). Dave lets me lead. Way cool climb - pretty easy if you know how to stem and jam. Lotsa pro. I had given Alastair a hard time about lugging his hexes around, but (climbing on Dave's rack) hexes work really well at Seneca. There are rap bolts at the top so we head down.
Dave wants to be a Hero. Right next to us is a classic 9, Marshall's Madness, and Crack of Dawn (10a), a variation to the top half of Marshall's. Dave is ready! The first pitch is short but really fun. Dave whimpers about some of the moves but I jam right through with no problems. Hanging belay time. Dave wants the next pitch too - 40' of easy looking wide cracks, then jog right and pull a roof to a jam crack. Ethics Man takes off and instantly finds the easy looking stuff is HARD! Everything is rounded and the wall is dead vertical. Moving slowly up, he arrives at the crux. Lots of thought required. Lots of gear. Lots of whining. Slow progress - up, down, hang, rest, think. Dave has misplaced his ethics. In his own words: EM's next strategy was to completely pack the entire crack with fresh blood (from his own hands) in the hope that a giant sticky clot would form and allow for safe passage. This doesn't work either. Back down, trade ends of the rope.
I have many advantages here: I clean lots of gear on the way up. Dave has placed pro right at the crux. I'm rested. I know how to do a hand jam. At the crux I take a short hang and then go for it. Great jams - what's Dave's problem, anyway? Getting easier. Low on gear. Step left and finish back on Marshell's Madness. Great pitch! I'm on top and bring Dave up. More hanging. No ethics. Suddenly, a bolt of lightning strikes Dave and he is burned to a crisp - divine punishment for his lack of ethics. The stench of burning flesh is overwhelming. No, wait, I've just been hallucinating while waiting endlessly for Dave to get up this puppy! The smell is actually coming from his hands as they slowly are ground into usless stumps. Dave, learn to jam!! Lotsa hangs - no ethics anywhere!! Finally he's up. Dave regularly kicks my butt at the Gunks; this feels good. So there, Mr. "I climb 5.11 in the gym" :-) :-)
We have no clue how to get down. We wander toward the top - hmm, a rap anchor on that down there tree. I climb down to see - someone is pulling down their rope. Looks familiar - it's Alastair and Mike! I get them to stop and wait and soon we're all down together. It's getting late. We're tired. What to do? Climb!!!!
My hit-list include Soler, a 5.7 over on the other side of the rock. I have my `Soler Slayer' - a 6" nut for the first pitch. Mike and Dave pair up and I head off with Alastair. Now, a sane person would swiftly climb an easy route, rap off the other side, and be right there. But no, fools that we are, we hike all the way down to the stream and back up the other side to reach a point probably 100' from where we started (if only someone dug a tunnel!). This sucked and we were exhausted. First problem is to find the route. The guidebook is useless - the photos are impossible to use unless you know how to orient around the local landmarks. The trail goes way up a ridge and the cuts over to the cliff face. Where? We don't know! How about to the right? I see a wide crack and start climbing. Nothing looks right, though. As a get higher and higher, I realize there's no second pitch - I'm almost at the top. Oh well - rap off a tree. We're on the wrong peak - I just bagged a 5.2 chimney! OK - now to find the climb. Lots of slanting ledges. Down, down, up, up, hmmm. This is it. It's really getting late but we're ready. The first pitch is pretty easy. The wide bit is no problem - could have done without the tube chock but that does make it more comfortable! Belay. Alastair comes up. Last pitch - straight up a vertical wall with random buckets and ledges. Sort of the High Exposure of Seneca. Alastair - do you want the lead? Although tired, he agrees. On up. It's a slow go. Very exposed. Funky moves. OK pro. He's gripped out of his mind but keeps going anyway. The shadows get longer and longer - finally `Off Belay'. I follow - no problems on the toprope. Lotsa fun. At the top, the sun is down and we had better get back home ourselves! We find a rap tree. Wasted time taking an extra rope, but all the raps seem to have anchors for single rope rappers. Darker and darker. The ledges are exposed and hard to follow. Alastair is dragging - still suffering from T and B? Did he bring his headlamp? No! You think he would learn!! Down the trail by starlight. Curses in the darkness - someone is having fun! No calls for help, though, so we plug on. It's after nine - no sign of the kids. Finally find them at dinner. Dave and Mike wimped out and hadn't bagged any more routes; they have taken off to camp in the woods.
Marti has a spot in Yokums campground. Right by a bunch of fake Teepees. Wahoo. The ground is lumpy but we now have a really thick air mattress so we're OK. Nobody else around - we sleep peacefully.
Next morning we find everyone at the parking lot. A new climber has appeared: Harold, a friend of Dave. It's Saturday and the crowds have arrived. Eric and Marti are with me, Alastair takes the day off from climbing to watch Jay (thanks, dude!). Mike is with us, Harold with Dave.
The crux today is finding a route without a crowd. Finally settle for Prune (5.7), right behind a couple. I'm about 20' up end something feels funny. My shoe just split open! Good thing I've got a spare pair! I try again. The first pitch is only 5.5 - no problem. Eric follows and Mike leads Marti behind us. The folks ahead of us are going pretty slow - the 5.6 just to the right is open. No problems there - Eric is being a hero. He's also bragging to everyone who will listen about his climbing career. Another short pitch and then the final wall: a cool looking finger crack looks good to me! It's Crispy Critter - a sandbag 5.7+. I wait for Marti and a real belay. It's pretty hard - I place lots of gear. Eric hangs a few times but makes it and impresses the locals. Mike leads on my gear and we're all on the summit. Eric has fun writing in the register. There's a party going on so we boogie (an engagement party, actually!). On down - Eric wants to lower instead of rap.
Eric and Marti have had enough. The weather is getting cloudy but Mike and I are ready for another route. Back to Prune - this time with the crux. It's fun - another great route. A pitch below the top, we traverse off to avoid possible bad weather. Dave and Harold have appeared and wait for us to rap. Nobody wants to climb anymore so we all head down. Alastair has managed to avoid killing Jay - all is well. Off to dinner.
We pull in to camp around 10 and settle everyone in. Suddenly, a van pulls up and millions of crazed 12 year old girls head for the teepee right next to us. They are loud an obnoxious but I fall asleep anyway. No so for Marti, Alastair, and Eric. Finally, around 1am, after Marti asks them to quiet down, Alastair gets really pissed and tells them off in a really loud voice. Peace at last.
We get up early. It rained lightly overnight and it's cloudy. We break camp as fast as possible, honk goodbye to our friends in the teepee, and clear out. That's our last night at Yokums. Ever. It's 7:30 and the weather looks bogus. We look for Mike and Dave; finally find them at the parking lot. It's not cold but I want to take the kids to Steamtown instead of getting rained on. Alastair stays with Dave and Mike and Harold to do Ecstasy (5.7). Later I find out they bailed after one pitch - they made a strategy mistake and waited over an hour for Harold to eat breakfast. As they climbed, it got colder and colder until they had to back off.
We drove as fast as we could to Scranton and spent a few hours at Steamtown. Jay loved it and Eric was pretty interested too. The day had turned really cold - glad we didn't climb.